Meet Christina. She has a tendency to refer to herself as a mother first, however she's learning to say, “I am a woman who raises A LOT of kids!” Her life is full of chaos, laundry, homework and kids' sports. She's fueled by coffee and home-cooked meals. Family is the most important thing in her life. You could definitely say her personality is sarcastic, witty and full of headstrong opinions. Nothing fuels her soul quite like writing about Motherhood, Marriage and Life as it happens to her.
Lately it has been on my mind to speak up about this ongoing issue in today's society. Why do women (mothers in particular) seem to think it is okay to press their opinions on one another?!?!
Look, none of us is going to parent the same. We may have similar ways of doing things... but we are not replicas of one another. One mom may prefer breastfeeding while another mom lives for bottle feeding. The "cry it out method" is best for some families, while co-sleeping is better for others. What works for me may not work for you...
and that is OKAY!!!!
We, as a tribe of mothers, need to learn to AGREE to DISAGREE on a lot of things. There is no right way to do things when it comes to parenting. Hell, after having three kids and one on the way, even I found each child needed to be parented differently. Let's stop shoving our views and biased opinions on one another. It's one thing to be ASKED for advice. It is a completely separate thing to throw it like a dagger. [read more on finding your Mom Tribe ] Just because we may not see eye to eye on certain areas of parenting doesn't mean either of us is a bad Mom. We seem to want to condemn and belittle the other for not agreeing with how we think children should be raised.
We are not God...leave judgment to Him.
I find that I can learn a lot from a mom who may parent differently than myself. For instance, with my first two kids I adamantly put them in cribs by the age of three months. With our third I find myself huddled in the fetal position as she hogs the bed because it’s the only way she will sleep through the night. With my first son I couldn't nurse past the first few weeks and went straight to the bottle. By my third I had learned new tricks and made it to three months of steady nursing.
You are never so set in your ways that you can't be open to another person's ideas. In that same context, we need to be slow to give our opinions until we know they are wanted and needed.
Moms, we need to learn to RESPECT and SUPPORT one another, no matter how we parent. We are all on this crazy adventure together and we need all the love we can get. So instead of bashing a mom for her unorthodox ways of doing things, applaud her for giving it one hell of a good try.
Have you ever felt beaten down after a mom said something that insulted you?
How did you handle the situation?
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