Wednesday, 13 April 2016

I'm (not) fine. An Open Letter to Moms About Not Being Okay

One of the things that has been most rewarding to me about venturing into blogging is the community I've found. Because I write what is going on in my head and heart and life, blogging is intensely personal for me and when I ask others to do the same and share a bit of themselves (like on Mombies Unite), I get that it is a really big deal. It's flashing the internet and it's out there in the world.

I write things down to make sense of my world which means that you feel like you know me and I feel like I know you and WE DO and that is REAL, but there is still a difference between my journal and my blog and I think that's good. I share real life but I don't share EVERY piece of me.

In fact, before I hit 'post' on my thoughts, I try to ask myself a few questions. 
  1. Will this hurt someone in my non-internet life? 
  2. If my kids read this as teenagers, how will it make them feel? 
  3. What is my purpose in sharing this today?
  4. Will this matter to someone else?
  5. If I leave this alone for a month, will I still feel like it's worth sharing?

For example, because of these questions, you have not received a play-by-play of my last nine years of marriage because:
  • Ain't nobody got time for that.
  • There's this other adult living life and walking around interacting with people and also involved in my marriage. Oh hey, husband!
  • I'm cooler on the internet than in real life... which is pretty scary, you guys, because how much of a mess am I HERE? Yikes.

And sometimes I feel like something has already been written and is so good and real that what can I add to it? But then I remember that writing isn't about adding to it. It's about saying "me too." So today, I want to open that door a crack and talk about something that is happening right now. It's not fixed and it doesn't end in everything being okay. I won't lie. I've been sitting on this post about post-partum anxiety because... well, anxiety. But then my daughter Emily said something so simple that it made me realize that it was important to share this too. She said, "In our house, there are no monsters."

And so, I wrote a letter about not being okay.  

Could you take a minute to read it here on Her View From Home?


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